Obedience

I work in a government agency. One Monday morning, I drive into the car park and in the process of parking my car, a woman pulls up beside me in her car apparently parking her car too. Since I'm parked before her, I open my door and it hits her car gently as our cars are parked quite close to each other. I'm trying to put my things into my handbag before I alight from my car. This woman comes out of her car and warns me in a loud voice that my car door is scratching her car and she hates her car being scratched and that I need to stop scratching her car.

Her tirade is weird because my door hit her car gently and her use of the word "scratching" doesn't make sense as my car door is currently not in motion. She keeps insisting that I am scratching her car and then it dawns on me that the only thing I can do to appease her and her car was to shut my door. That was also weird cause I was supposed to be alighting from my car. I shut my door and she sashays away.

I have parked in that car park for a long time and she was unfamiliar. I bet she didn't work in the building. As I was heading to my office, I wondered what if she was headed to my office too. What if I got to my desk and she was in the waiting room? What if I had the duty of handling whatever file or contract she was pursuing? What would she do if at some point she needed my assistance officially? My guess is she would apologise the moment she realizes I was the one she was rude to. Then she will proceed to blame her rude behaviour on one thing or the other. If I was her I'll likely do the same and so would a typical Nigerian. 

I imagine I'll forgive her and help her in any way I can. What strikes me is that although I may decide to overlook the incident and assist her, I will know in my heart of hearts that this woman is not genuinely sorry for her behaviour. She is sorry only to the extent that her action may prevent her business from making progress. She is sorry she was rude to the wrong person. In another car park on another day, she is very likely to behave in a rude manner. Her nature will most probably remain the same. She is sorry for the moment she is before me.

Is that how God feels when we make a habitual practice of sin? We come by first saying we are sorry so that He forgives us and then we proceed to our major prayer points. You know the prayer of a sinner is an abomination to God so we start by getting the "I'm sorry" out of the way. So yes God forgives us but He being omniscient knows our nature is not changed and that we are only sorry for that moment. If I were Him, I would not be too happy. I'd rather that we take on the nature of doing the right thing instead of habitually doing the wrong thing and then whipping out the "I'm sorry" when our file gets to His desk just because we need His assistance. Obedience is better than sacrifice/apology. 

Sometimes

While I'm pondering over a challenge, God answers. Sometimes. 

Other times, my knees have barely settled on the floor with my mouth commencing the business of speech and then I get an answer - a God idea.

Such instances remind me of His words in Isaiah 65:24 - Before they call I will answer; and while they are yet speaking I will hear.

He is truly amazing.

A Stitch in Time...

When I was buying a car two years ago, all I thought I needed was money to fuel it. Contrary to expectations, the money spent over the years on repairs is enough to buy a third-hand car. It's my fault. I had no idea how to manage a car. All I thought the car needed was fuel.

In retrospect I observe that I spent so much money repairing the car because of its little faults I ignored. Those seemingly small issues resulted in great issues requiring great money to fix. If only I had sought my mechanic's attention when the car jerked a few times. And when the fuel gauge stayed up long after I removed the key from the ignition. I should have called him when it seemed the car preferred the ac off. Like you could literally hear the car heave a sigh of relief when I turned off the ac.

But no. All that was on my mind was how I needed to be at the office in fifteen minutes and how my car was strong enough at that moment to take me there. I'll call my mechanic on Saturday. Then Saturday came. No I have too many places to drive to this Saturday, I'll call my mechanic next weekend. You will not believe (I can not believe it too) that I did not call my mechanic until my car stopped right in the middle of the highway.

I'm not in the mood to start listing lessons learnt spiritual and otherwise. If you like take the lesson, if you like leave it. What should have taken a day and like 10k to rectify has now taken many days and a lot of money. A stitch in time saves ninety-nine. 

Job

The book of Job in the bible has always intrigued me. I could never understand why God would let someone who was upright in His eyes be so humiliated by the devil. Of all people to be toyed around with, why Job? This same brother Job who feared God and shunned evil?

Well I've been facing a few challenges and I have been asking God questions. Yes. Some folks are of the opinion that we shouldn't question God. I'm not sure I entirely understand what they mean. When I am confused, I ask God questions. Thankfully so far He hasn't sent the Holy Spirit to flog me :).

By divine purpose (some may call it coincidence), I was with my phone one night and two of my friends caused me to read certain chapters in Job. One of them tweeted a general tweet and the other told me to do so in the course of our bbm convo. I had read the whole book of Job some years back and was curious to see what the content of those chapters were. All this happened close to midnight and I was sleepy so I left the bible study till the next day.

After studying the chapters, my questions were 90% answered and I learnt a few lessons which I will now share.

1. We hail Job that he feared God and shunned evil (Job 1:1). Well guess who put the fear of God (wisdom) in him? God! God says in Job 39:13-17 that because He did not give the ostrich wisdom it behaves foolishly. It reminds me of that scripture that says blessed is the man whom God causes to approach Him (Psalm 65:4). 

My lesson: Be thankful to God for the wisdom to fear Him and keep His commandments. Don't take it for granted.

2. Job was a guy who knew all the formulas. He feared God, shunned evil, was righteous (Job 31) and constantly sacrificed on behalf of his children. He even writes a chapter (Job 28) on where to find wisdom. Yes he was the man. But things still went wrong at a point.

My lesson: God does not want to be primarily seen as a robot/computer/calculator/atm that you punch in formulas and get a certain result. He still has the prerogative. Serve Him for Him and not just rewards.

3. Job lost everything. EVERYTHING. He was bereaved, sick and poor. The wife and friends he had left were not helping matters at all. It seems like God was more concerned about Job being in His will than He was about how comfortable and smooth Job's life was going. The doctrine preached at modern churches these days is that the richer you are as a christian, the more likely it is that you are truly applying God's word. It is not so. They that say they must be rich fall into a trap (1 Tim 6:6-10).

My lesson: God is more concerned about you having eternal life and fulfilling His will here on earth than He is about your fleshly comfort. Let your christian walk not mainly revolve around applying the seed principle so that you will live a wealthy life. 

4. After Job accepted that God had the final say in his life, God restored him to a better state than he was at the beginning.

My lesson: Challenges come and go. God's blessing at the end will make the process worth it.  

A Plan of Dependence

Gods plan for our life is one of dependence on Him. He really meant what He said in John 15:5. Without Him you can do nothing, without Him you can be nothing. His plan is not for you to be 99% dependent on Him and 1% dependent on yourself/others. He wants you to be a 100% dependent on Him. That sounds kinda weird I know. So why do we have a mind, talent, resources? I really don't know for now. 

What I do know is that He wants to be the initiator and director of our desires and actions. Every step no matter how mundane should emanate from His grace and provision. Like what to wear, who to see, etc. He wants our hearts constantly averted to Him at the beginning, middle and end. The moment we start sorting ourselves out or depending on our resources is when we start cutting off from Him and finding our own way. Please stop.

The divine plan is one of total leaning, total pleasing and total looking to Him. He is the author and finisher. He started the project by giving you the breath of life and wants you to let Him complete it. Whenever you feel you are in charge, it may be wise to hint Him that He's actually the one in charge. He sees your heart you know.

When you are full, give thanks. When you are empty, give thanks. Let Him know He is everything to you. 

Fathers Day

I've been studying the book of 1 Kings with @thelafamily. Its amazing how Solomon could turn away from God inspite of how awesome God was to him and how He blessed him with wisdom and riches and honour. Even more amazing was God's insistence that Solomon's reign will be blessed and will continue despite Solomon's disobedience. God predicated this decision on the relationship He had with Solomon's father David. Instead the punishment for Solomon's disobedience would be experienced in the reign of Solomon's son Rehoboam. 

Because of David's walk with God, it had to be well in Solomon's reign. Because of Solomon's disobedience, it was not well in Rehoboam's reign and some period afterwards. In the books of Jeremiah and Ezekiel, the Lord said it will no longer be said "The fathers have eaten sour grapes,

and the children's teeth are set on edge". So God may no longer be visiting a father's iniquity on his children and children's children. I still think though that the consequences of a father's choice to walk or not walk with God will reflect more on the lives of his adult children. 

One of the resultant effects of our salvation is to raise godly seed. When we walk with God, our seed is blessed. The faith and prayers of a blessed man goes ahead into the coming generations to bless his descendants. Some may walk outside God's word and feel they are doing well in their faithlessness without giving a though to th. It's harsh to say but the truth is that their refusal to walk with God will negatively affect their seed more than it will affect them. The devil may be using kid gloves with them but is reserving the sledgehammer for their seed/children. 

His Will, His Word

The concept of God's will is an endearing one. People say:

"I want God's will to prevail in my life" 

"It is best to marry according to God's will"

"Have you found out God's will regarding that situation?"

"May God's will be done in this home/office"

Well, talk is cheap.

God's will is God's word. God's will for our life is our obedience to the word of God, the bible. God's will for Adam and Eve was to follow His instruction. They disobeyed his clear instruction and fell out of His will and consequently out of the favour the garden of Eden represented. 

God's will is not a mystery. When we are serious about being in God's will, we will study that beautiful book called the bible and DO what it says.

Faith

He's constantly teaching me how to live by faith. And never to feel I have it all figured out. Because just when I'm confident I've sorted myself out, BOOM! That sound preceding the falling apart of things. Sometimes things go so smoothly that we forget to pray about them and forget to be thankful for them. Then something snaps out of place and we realize it's been God's grace all along. I'm thankful to God for reminding me not to take his favour for granted. No matter how small or common it seems.

Living My Best Life

2013 is gradually coming to an end. I haven't experienced a more eventful year in all my years of existence. Stuff happened to me. Roller coaster ride things. I had to move over and let God take the wheel. Three jobs in one year? It could only have been by God's grace. The biggest testimony of them all is the joy unspeakable I now possess. Joy in spite of the sad news I occasionally received during the course of the year. Joy in spite of that relationship I lack. I may not be where I want to be right now but the journey has been worthwhile because I've felt God's presence with me every step of the way.

Yesterday I sewed my first dress after four months of tailoring school. Phew! The dress looks terrible lol. Seriously, it does. I can't even wear it across the main street. Still I'm so happy. I'll have to make adjustments to it and maybe it will turn out great. I quite enjoyed the process of sewing it despite how physically and mentally tasking it was. The sewing machine behaved excellently and NEPA didn't cut off electricity :D. An enjoyable and tasking sewing process yet an imperfect dress at the end of it. A bit like this point in my year so far. Don't get me wrong, this year has produced loads of good stuff but there's that one critical prayer request that seems to have been put on hold. But I'm hopeful. Oh yes I am. 

I'm thankful for a great year, thankful for God's blessings, thankful for the bumpy ride. And just like I'm going to adjust that dress to make it as beautiful as possible, I have faith all things are working out for my good and that my heavenly Father will grant my heart's desires as I delight myself in Him.

My Roommate

There's a small lizard living in my room. Or a big wall gecko. My brother thinks it's a gecko, I think it's a lizard. Lets call it lizzy. I don't know how lizzy got into my room. Someone must have left my door or window wide open and I suspect that someone is my mum. I don't like animals. I particularly hate reptiles. Lizzy's presence makes me feel I'm accommodating an unwanted guest. And in fact I am. I haven't been able to sleep well the past few days. I actually prayed to God that lizzy finds an exit out of my room or dies as soon as possible. I'd rather have a dead lizzy than a living lizzy. I'm still waiting on God to answer my prayer. 

I could decide to chase the thing around my room but then it would creep under the bed or behind the wardrobe. I am unhappy. I'm startled when I hear noise in the room because I think it's lizzy in motion. I'm reluctant to touch anything, from stuff on my dressing table to my clothes, because I hate to imagine the tours lizzy may have undertaken across my belongings in my absence. When I come back from work, I stay in the sitting room longer than usual before going to my room because it inhabits something I'm not eager to meet. 

The experience sort of gives me a clue to why some husbands like to chillllllll out after work before coming home. Imagine going home daily to someone you would rather not be living with, for example my roommate lizzy. So it does matter who I end up with, his character, etc. If he makes me really uncomfortable most of the time now, he might constantly make my skin crawl when we are married and living together. Then I will have to pray for God to make him disappear from my life or even better, that God kills him. Lol.